What is Confidence?

In the personal development world, the word ‘confidence’ is thrown around a lot, but do we really understand what it means?

Usually when we think of a confident person, we think about a person who can work a room, someone is super outgoing, has loads of friends and perhaps a successful high-status job.

But what if I told you that even a person who matches that description perfectly can still severely lack confidence?

How is that possible?

Because confidence has less to do with how society perceives you and more to do with the internal relationship you have with yourself.

When we portray an image of confidence before truly embodying it, we put ourselves off balance.

Focusing on your appearance of confidence pulls away from your ability to actually build yourself.

This feigned confidence can easily be broken when tested or faced with unfamiliar situations, because it has not developed from a strong foundation.

So the feelings of discomfort and anxiety associated with a lack of confidence will still remain.

You won’t feel deserving of the opportunities you gained with the external confidence, so you’ll struggle with imposter syndrome and low self-esteem, which can often be detected by others.

You’ll feel completely out of alignment, because you’ve been neglecting yourself and lying to others by pretending to be someone you’re not.

This can be detrimental to your confidence.

Acting and confident and being confident are two different things, When you grow your confidence from the inside out, there is no need to act.

Building confidence requires you to be patient. It requires that you completely destroy your mind’s self-limiting beliefs and re-program your subconscious mind.

In childhood, your psyche is incredibly sensitive to negative programming, no matter how subtle.

It is for this reason that re-training the mind to accept positive beliefs in our adulthood is more of a challenge.

Although it is more challenging, it is a lot more sustainable than ‘faking it ‘til you make it’.

There are several ways you can reprogram the subconscious mind to build your internal confidence.

One of the big ways you can do this is by keeping your promises to yourself (even the seemingly insignificant ones).

Set small goals for yourself daily and do what is necessary to achieve them.

And when I say ‘small’ goals, that is exactly what I mean.

For instance, if you plan to meditate for 5 minutes tomorrow, just do it. No excuses.

You don’t need to have it in your calendar and make a big deal out of it beforehand. Just grab a few spare anywhere in your day and go for it.

Each day that you achieve a small goal like this, you slowly build a more trusting relationship with yourself. Your subconscious mind begins to observe the alignment between your thoughts, words and actions.

The mind keeps track of this and builds a catalogue of evidence that proves to you how trustworthy and reliable you are.

Overtime, your confidence will grow and, this time, it will be unbreakable. It will be with you in every situation, every day for the rest of your life.

There would be no one outside of yourself who could ever break your confidence.

This is when you become unbreakable.

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Want to build your confidence from the inside out? Start here with the 'Spiritual Health' chapter of the Original Volume.

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